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Who’s Driving This Thing?

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Have you ever had a dance like this?

Last night I was dancing with this kid who also leads and follows. We were switching off roles, experimenting with cutesy ways of getting into and out of a lead or follow role. Turns out there are a million ways to do this as long as nobody gets thrown on the floor.

So at one point during the song, he looks at me and goes, “Wait, am I leading?”

Both of us crack up, and I’m like, “I have no idea!”

What was so great about it is that we didn’t even stop dancing for a second. We just kept going along, totally connected, totally feeling the music, and neither of us had any idea, or really cared, at that point, who was leading and who was following.

We were just dancing! What a concept, right?

To me, this is the ultimate point of learning to dance the opposite role. You finally get to where it doesn’t really make much difference who’s leading and who’s following. You’re just connected with your partner and the music in one big cooperative project.

I think you only get this kind of situation when you’ve got a lead who’s so open to listening to his (her) follow that he (she) can switch instantly into response mode when the follow initiates something. And you have to have a follow who’s willing to not only feel and act on her (his) own musical impulses but actually take responsibility for communicating them clearly to her (his) partner.

In other words, a lead who knows how to follow, and a follow who knows how to lead. Or, of course, two of one or the other.

And I think there’s just something so symbolically right, so evolved, about all of this.

So what do you all think? Am I wrong?



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